Being a fan of Richard Armitage Part 9 : Existing dream jobs

I have to WARN You!!! 

This post is very naughty in some parts :)

There is my top of Existing dream jobs

RICHARD ARMITAGE'S PERSONAL NIPPLE TWEAKER

First I have to say, that I'm practical person and I was thinking why men have nipples? They don't using them for breast feeding, till Richard ;) 

From biology. (Thank You J. Kennard)

"As embryos men and women have similar tissues and body parts. If anything the embryo follows a 'female template'. That is why nipples are present in both sexes. It is the effect of the genes, the Y chromosome and the hormone testosterone that brings about the changes and masculinises the embryo. Testosterone promotes the growth of the penis and testicles. Because nipples are there before this process begins the nipples stay!

Nipples and breast tissue have no function as such except for perhaps protecting the heart and lungs from injury. Male Breasts Can Produce Milk and Get Breast Cancer.

A certain level of the female hormone estrogen is present in all men. If, as a result of disease or a condition affecting hormones, breast tissue in men can grow (gynecomastia- abnormal enlargement of breasts,) and men can produce milk. Gynacomastia is more commonly seen in adolescence, a period in development when hormones fluctuate a lot. It is also seen in some men with liver disease and sometimes in alcoholics. Men can get breast cancer as well as women."

Thank You Wendy! :) This is really extraordinary. I was working at this post, and Wendy send me this pic in this same time :) 6 sense!

 

Jennifer Lopez, Claudia Schiffer, Nikki Schieler, Jennifer Love Hewitt are one of the only few of celebs who have their own NTweaker and we know about it.

About Christina NTweaker this is not so very truthful. You can read here e.g.: Christina Aguilera's Nipple Tweaker Goes on Strike Her NTweaker Tyron Pecho (if he exists) (Pecho from spanish breast) said: We can't be easily replaced. Yes. This is really serious job. Not for everybody, this is some kind of art. Did You know that any of fashion show can't be without NTweaker? NTweaker payments are dependent on popularity of the celeb.

RICHARD ARMITAGE'S PERSONAL ASSISTANT

This one is really nice! But very responsible. 

Here You can order book which is written by personal assistants from USA FabJob Guide to Become a Celebrity Personal Assistant.

Did You know that Mariah Carey has 15 personal assistants?

And they are for some special jobs.

• Check the décor of the suite, food before her arrival etc, etc.
• She has an assistant whose job it is to follow her with wet wipes to clean her hands after she has touched anything, and also to clean anything which she might potentially touch. 
• Another prances in her wake with a glass of warm water and a straw. The water has to be kept at just a little above room temperature to help her voice.
• Mariah being told 'You are looking beautiful today' by her assistant, each and every day within a few minutes of her waking up.
• And One of her assistants is checking if her breast is looking good.

But she pays well.

Victoria Beckham has assistants who inform her what was in tabloids and who she can summons.

Britney has assistant who can hold her lollypop.

Kate Bosworth has assistant who is holding her cell phone.

Richard Armitage's Assistants :)

1. To wake up Mr Armitage - 'Mr Armitage is 4 o c'lock..You have to be on set....Thorin is waiting......  *snoring* ................WAKE UUUUUUUUUUP!!!!!!!!!!!" or I have some tip ;) just touch an ear, it always works to wake up somebody and this is very gently. :)

2. I like this one from Mariah: 'You are looking beautiful today'

3. Snug Seat Inspector
to checking if Richard's peaches looks nice in jeans. ;)
(Thank You Wendy :) )

My Personal fav.

4. For combing his beard (OMG OMG OMG!!!!) or checking if sideburns have this same length.

5. For moisturizing air round about him for better skin condition. Preparing moisturizing beauty mask.
6. For telling to journalists about not asking about his Circus job.
7. Checking if his chest hair is looking good in shirt.

8. For preparing porridge with an egg, salmon with couscou...cuscous...who the heck named food like this!? And Green Thai Chicken Curry with Chilli.

9.  Checking if his hair looking good.

10. Helping him with his flat cap.

 etc. :)

BTW Please don't feel offended, and please don't think that I'm playing a joke on Richard. This is much more joke on myself :)

Plus extra

RICHARD ARMITAGE'S PERSONAL ODOR TESTER

Before deodorants and anti-perspirants are released into the market, manufacturers employ people who test if these products actually work. Translation: these people smell other people’s armpits for a living.

Don't ask...

You know there is many jobs with celebs, but they just don't suits me...e.g. Celebrity Twitter Ghost Writer. 50 Cent, Britney Spears, Barack Obama, Guy Kawasaki are using this kind of Ghost Writters, but better for Richard has not Twitter, than has somebody who is "fake". I will be feel a little offended, knowing that this isn't He who is writting. If Richard Armitage is busy, so he is busy and he don't has time for Twitter. Amen.

Faithless - Tweak Your Nipple

But this song is about something more important. :)